Intertwined Mishaps

I thought I found love once
In the back of a mouth
Tastes, textures unknown to my tongue
But swallowed & digested; it disappeared
And I’ve searched and burned the earth
Looking, searching, yearning
To find that feeling
To hold it again
To never let it escape

I thought I found love once
In a pile of crumpled clothes
Sweat rimmed necklines
And a beer stain on the back of one arm
Heavy breathing elbows and hair
Flying about every which way
Madness, beauty, chaos, pain
Empty left side in the morning
Ever since I’ve been trying to reel that joy back in

I thought I found love once
In the reflection in the mirror
Curves abound and eyes that shimmered
In the light; curls framing a beautiful face
A smile that showed no pain
Then the scars came into view
Tears welled up and I floated back down
To a bloated reality
Searching, still, to find that relief

I searched for love with no avail
Until I searched no more
I found love buried within the ground
Cold and dead and turned to earth
I wept and smiled and laughed and realized
I realized
Love
Doesn’t want to be found